Time Goes By...

Join in with competitions to make the best trials... with a twist!

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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by kwando1313 »

5.5 hours remain. Hopefully you're all done, guys~
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by Spongesonic »

kwando1313 wrote:5.5 hours remain. Hopefully you're all done, guys~
NIGHT OF THE FINAL DAY
5.5 Hours Remain
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by Enthalpy »

Ferdie and I have submitted what we have. Assuming that nobody is lying about whether they have submitted, this leaves...

* MatthewJames5
* Gamer2002 / chubbyloremaster
* Any unannounced entrants

EDIT: One hour remaining until the formal timeline is EXPIRED.
[D]isordered speech is not so much injury to the lips that give it forth, as to the disproportion and incoherence of things in themselves, so negligently expressed. ~ Ben Jonson
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by kwando1313 »

Aaaaaand the deadline is passed~

Good luck to all competitors~ (Speaking of which, who actually submitted?)
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by Enthalpy »

...Or not because the time zone converters we used had issues with DST. One hour left, plus DWaM's "fudge factor."

It's also worth noting that MatthewJames5 hasn't been on in over a month, so per DWaM's statements in xat, the only one left to submit is Gamer2002/chubbyloremaster, and any surprise entrants. No surprise entries have yet been received.
[D]isordered speech is not so much injury to the lips that give it forth, as to the disproportion and incoherence of things in themselves, so negligently expressed. ~ Ben Jonson
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by kwando1313 »

Also, apparently DWaM magically reviewed all entries already.

Man, that means our entries are all really short this time.
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by GuardianDreamer »

Obviously DWaM beta-tested all the entries and then wiped everyone's memories somehow. That, or he reads faster than I can ever hope to read.
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by kwando1313 »

GuardianDreamer wrote:Obviously DWaM beta-tested all the entries and then wiped everyone's memories somehow. That, or he reads faster than I can ever hope to read.
So DWaM is secretly a man in black? Well play-*mind-wiped*

What's going on again?

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Deadline has now officially paaaaassed.
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by enigma »

kwando1313 wrote:Also, apparently DWaM magically reviewed all entries already.

Man, that means our entries are all really short this time.
W-Wait! What? I'm only halfway through the first submission! Though, yesterday was Monday for me... So, a school day. And I do have homework. But STILL! ;A;
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by Bad Player »

enigma wrote:
kwando1313 wrote:Also, apparently DWaM magically reviewed all entries already.

Man, that means our entries are all really short this time.
W-Wait! What? I'm only halfway through the first submission! Though, yesterday was Monday for me... So, a school day. And I do have homework. But STILL! ;A;
jeez enigma, so zetta slow
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by kwando1313 »

GOTTA COMP QUICK
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by enigma »

It's time for the very first of the...

Enigma Judges! Episode/Entry 1!
Spoiler : NN and Kwando's Entry :
Okay, NN and Kwando's entry. I've been waiting for this for ages. I'm super hyped for th-

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...oh god.


Enigma Play's: Mahou Shojou Lyrical Nanoha ~ BondS
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So, the game opens with a prompt asking me whether I know who has the raging heart. Five seconds and a google search tells me that it's Nanoha. So, let's try that out.

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...........................................Welp. I guess we're done.

FINAL VERDICT

10/10

Truly, no words can describe this tale. Bravo! Bravo! (clap)











Enigma Play's: Mahou Shojou Lyrical Nanoha ~ BondS
30 minutes of reloading later, and I'm back at the title screen. Thanks for that, by the way. I needed that time to regather my thoughts on the GENIUS that was "The End" ending. Good Job.

Anyway, this time I picked no.

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This time, I'm greeted with a preloader with some funky little animations an-

STANDBY READY!!

Neat effect, but sudden robot voice scared the HELL OUT OF ME! ;A;

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Ohohoho~ Looks like we're getting some MadoMagi style shizzle up in here~! Me likey! And it's accompanied by what sounds like a cross between Harry Potter and Ghibli music. Not bad. Still, one tip. Try and use a timer on your prologues in future. ^_^"

So, anyway, we're given a prologue that's interesting enough. I mean, it could have done with some pictures but it did it's job. Basically, the prologue explained to me what's going on. There was this person who wished for calm days with their friends and then suddenly attacker (yes, that is the term used. Really, guys? Attacker? Is our protagonist a gooder? :T) appeared and now they have to fight again, and whatnot.

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Woohoo~! Woohooo~! *Munches popcorn*

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Aaaaand, holy crap. That was impressive. You can't see it here as a static image, but basically, that was a buttery-smooth fancy pants animation like in a real anime!

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And now we're thrown straight into the action while ridiculously cool music plays in the background! My excitement levels have exceeded maximum capacity! I'm going down captain!!!

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You know what? I don't even mind that I'm playing as Nanoha, please let this be an action packed battle minigame~!

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...oh. And I was so pumped for super action nanoha magical battle gameplay... Once again, NN's shame shines through.

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Anyway, Nanoha gloats about how she can fly and I can't and stuff you Nanoha that superman cape was a dud... I may be reading a little too much into what she said. And then, suddenly, I get Raising Heart as evidence. Now, I don't watch the show, but isn't Raising Heart a weapon? Not, like, a necklace? I thought jewelery was more Madoka's thing.

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OH MY GOD! IT TALKED! THE NECKLACE TALKED! How is that even possible?! It doesn't have a mouth! Does it... Does it just emit psychic vibes? Is there a mini tape recorder inside the bauble? And why does it call me master?! Stop being a creep, creepy necklace!

And so, with the help of terrifying Terry the talking necklace, Nanoha flies high into the air an-

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It was all a dream. Okay. Good show, run credits. (y)

Just kidding~! Aren't I cute/funny~? Ahaha. Okay, so Nanoha wakes up and she's in class and the-

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ARGH! IT'S ME! WHAT AM- COUGH! HACK! I mean, IT'S ALISA! What is she doing here?! And why are tiny white pixel monsters trying to devour her?!

Anyhoo, Alisa gets mad at me for sleeping because I was supposed to hang out with her after school (wow, Nanoha. You're a pretty crummy friend. Look at poor Alisa's strangely sharp chinned pouty face!) and Nanoha starts telling me her lifestory. And, it seems pretty routine at first and then-

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This happens. Is this... Is this canon? Is that what gives magical girls powers? Ferrets?! As in the long slinky rats?! And, not only that, this is a long slinky rat of the pink haired murderous yandere variety?! I... Okay. I'm sure that this makes perfectly logical sense in the world of Nanoha. Moving on.

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So, it turns out that Nanoha has some kind of serious problem where she zones out and starts narrating to invisible people, and that they're on a vaca- Wait a minute! Then why are you in school?! Since when did people go to school on vacations?!

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...wait. Does Alisa ACTUALLY think we were training when we were clearly asleep?! I thought I, I MEAN SHE, DAMMIT! Was supposed to be one of the smart ones...

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BAM! Oh hi there, strange purple hair girl who is apparently also being affected by that white flea epidemic. What can I do for you today?

Anyway, Alisa gets annoyed and acts all tsundere and we find out that the mystery girl is called Suzuka.

Also, I can't help but notice that, even now, Suzuka keeps a perpetually worried and perplexed expression. It's making me feel kind of worried myself.

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"HI NANOHA, IT'S ALWAYS NICE TO SEE YOU, AND BY NICE I MEAN DISTRESSING! SERIOUSLY! I AM TERRIFIED RIGHT NOW! AND WHY ARE THESE LITTLE WHITE TICKS DEVOURING ME?!"

(Can I also mention that ever since Alisa's theme finished playing once, there's been a creepy silence ever since. I'm almost tempted to play Higurashi music over this scene, but it would probably cause perpetually-worried Suzuka to pass out in fear...)

So, basically, we find out that Suzuka's been Nanoha's friend for as long as Alisa and that she's a super nice person or whatever. And then Suzuka tries to subtly get rid of me. Nanoha pretends like she didn't catch the hint, and Suzuka then goes back to being all nice to me. Hmmm... I know your up to something, Suzu. Oh, yeah. And Alisa acts tsundere some more. And then Fa-

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....Fate's put on some weight. And sharpened her chin a lot. AND SHE'S INFECTED WITH THE WHITE TICKS AS WELL! ARGH! Get away from me, Fate! I don't want to die!

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And then another one of Nanoha's terrifying friends shows up. This time, it's wide-eyes mcgee. The little girl with the giant eyes that see into your soul and devours your life force.

Anyway, we get some more small talk about their friendship (Yugioh! The trial!) while Umineko music plays, and then it's Fate's turn to have her story explained to the audience.

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And by "talk about problems", I mean I blew you up.

Anyway, after we've confirmed that Nanoha is a super best friend and that Fate is a woobie, we get back into jazzy happy swing time fun~!

(Also, it is at this point that I finally realized that Wide-Eyes McGee is actually Hayate. I'm...not very good at this.)

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And then it's time to hear all about Hayate and how she also has a super depressing story. Oh, and also more on how Nanoha is still super best friend. Man, I feel like I'm in xat right now. XP

But, being serious, I do feel this scene is a bit... heavy handed. Like, the music and all the stuff about friendship and what if things had happened differently... It just feels a little bit over the top. It's well written, but I don't particularly feel bad or feel emotional as a result of the amount of "friendship" injected into this. Also, Hayate's sprite is still terrifyingly distracting. In any case, well written, but I feel like it tried too hard to make me feel sympathy or such.

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...This isn't going to be the whole case, is it? A murder DOES happen, right? Come on, Kwando. I know you want to do a locked room. NN! I'm sure you've got mystery ideas, right?

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I feel like this image best shows the issues I mentioned in my last complaint. Cycle of sadness and loneliness... I just can't imagine anyone saying that. It feels, well, corny, to be honest. Maybe if I was a Nanoha fan, this would speak volumes but to an outsider like me... It just makes me dislike Fate and Hayate BECAUSE of how hard the script is trying to make me feel sorry for them. Also, I always feel like it's better to show friendship than to just talk about how great friends are and such, but that's just me.

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Ah! Thank god Alisa's here to break up Mopefest 2014~!

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Uh... It's okay, Alisa. That didn't call for another speech on friendship. We don't need to hear how super amazing best friends they are. Really.

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...Does what Alisa said really need translating, Suzu? It seemed to be pretty clear cut from where I'm standing. :/

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Alrighty~ Over to Hayate's house for some milk and cookies~!

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...wait. what? The... The murder isn't starting now, is it? Y-You're not planning to k-kill me, are you? Are you, Alisa?! Heh heheh.... D-Don't...S-Stop messing about... WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH THAT RACKETTENHAMMER?! OH GOD! NOOOOO!

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Sorry, Nanoha. You know the rules. All disputes are settled with explosions, not talking.

So, Alisa tries to get me to run laps around the school. And Suzu tells me that she really means "that [Alisa]'s fine" and Alisa finally calls Suzu out on her poop!

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And then, after a little tirade or rant or whatnot about Suzu's behaviour, Alisa starts doing Suzu's job for her. I'm... a little lost here, actually. That just seems so strange considering how she was acting earlier.

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Anyway, now we reach our first investigation segment. I'm going to try out a bunch of stuff, but I won't LP them here, purely for brevity.

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....Okay, now I said I wasn't going to LP the investigation segment but...um, what? Even in context, I don't know how this was supposed to be taken. Hell! It's worse in context! Because you're telling me that Nanoha beat up the wheelchair bound girls friends! All while chirpy music plays in the background! Are you sure Nanoha's a great friend?!

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....................................................."i wish i was as kind as her"~Nanoha, 20XX

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.......don't you just love the power of friendship?

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Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure, Nanoha. Suuuuuuure. :sideglance2:

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Ah, she finally admits it.

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A system where you beat people up and they give you money?! How has this amazing system never been thought up before! Your uniform could be a beanie and a dirty tracksuit, and you could even work in a corporate group called a "gang"!

Anyway, we have more fun pointing out that Nanoha is a psychopath and then we all laugh and say "but, nah. Seriously, she's a great friend." After that, Alisa says she has a surprise for me. I wonder what it could be?

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So, Suzuka and Alisa made a deal with Kyuubey to become magical girls in exchange for one wish. Tune in next week for Puella Magi AliSuzu Magica.

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Hooray~! Now you guys can risk your lives on a daily basis too~! YAY~!

Alisa and Suzuka then proceed to tell Nanoha that they plan to train on their own without any supervision and Nanoha points it's extremely dangerous. And then let's them do it anyway. In other news, I just realised that the capitalised letters in the subtitle are B and S. :3

Anyhoo~ I'm going to go head over to Hayate's house for some Milk AND COOKIES!

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Woah! Who's this jerk?!

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Oh, it's just Vitamin C.

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WO-HOAH! What the hell?! Why is she so HD?! Is she the favorite? Is that why? Like, this is a very high quality sprite. But it does make the others look...well, worse by comparison. Hm...

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Wait... What? How old is Vita, again? She looks a little too old for Primary School to me...

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Because we really NEED more of those... :sideglance2:

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Wait. What? She's 9?! What is this?! Dammit, Anime ages!

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Uh... Who are you and why are you talking about mistresses?

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WHAT?! YOU'RE 9! SHE'S 10! YOU'RE BOTH FAR TOO YOUNG TO BE HAVING AFFAIRS!

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.......................................

A-Anyway! Vita agrees to go to the school, and that scene wraps up. Also, can we get a bit more musical variety in here? This jazzy fun time swing is getting kinda grating. :T

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Oh, good morning Madame Tiny Head. Seriously, compare the size of her body to that head size. Something's definitely not right...

Anywa- WAIT A SECOND! Isn't that Keiichi's kitchen from Higurashi!? Just with the colours edited a bit? Lemme che- IT IS! I checked my Higu folder, and that's definitely Keiichi's kitchen! Just with a few minor edits! Damn! Looks like we have a winner for best bg, guys.

So, it turns out Madame Small Head is called Shamal, and they sent out some kind of werewolf golem to go get some milk. Because magic can't be magical ALL the time.

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And that brings us to our second investigation segment. Once again, I don't plan to LP any of the stuff from here and will, instead, summarize it.

So, first off. I learnt that Hayate has a pretty nice kitchen considering five people use it. Fifty times.

We got more Nanoha-plot explaining exposition, and then Fate and Signum decided to blissfully murder eachother in the yard. And then we get more talking about how tragic Fate's life is and how Fate's mother is an alien from another planet who eats Grief Seeds. And then Hayate strokes Nanoha's ego for a little bit.

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And then Vita summarises the series, right here. And then w-

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WAAAAIT! WH-WHAT IS THIS?! THIS MUSIC?! THESE WORDS?! COULD IT BE... (GOOOOOOOO) NANOHA IS ABOUT TO BECOME A WITCH?!

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Oh.

Um... Well... That came out of nowhere. You guys just talked about what great friends you were and then suddenly Nanoha does this out of nowhere... Uh... I think that was pretty sudden and out of the blue. I...don't really know what to say.

Also, you have disappointed me again. Shame.

Anyway, now Nanoha tells them everything that's going on and Vita makes a few planet-ist remarks, and then they all decide they have to save Alisa and Suzu, even though they don't know that they even need saving. Honestly? I have quite a few objections to the way friendship is being portrayed right now. But that's my own personal views, and I'm not going to mix them into an impartial LP/report.

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....Yep. The epitome of in peril right here. I can just hear the fear in Alisa's voice. Anyway, they basically just talk about how Nanoha is a silly worrywart and then they admit they have no idea what they're doing. I guess it's up to me to go find something for them to...magical girl, or whatnot.

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Investigation time~!

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Sigh... Come on, guys. We've done enough reminiscing already. Can we please just have, I don't know, something happen? So far the only conflict wasn't really anything to worry about at all. Really, I feel like this game is nothing more than a summary of Nanoha at this point and...that's not a good thing. But, let's see what happens anyway.

Oh. It's another friendship speech.

Anyway! Now that that's over, back to the game~! Let's see if I can find some magic stuffs to do~!

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Uh oh. The Umineko music is starting. Please tell me this doesn't result in another friendship speech.

So, it turns out that what they found is a card and then Suzuka suddenly decides she wants to go back and see Nanoha and the others again. Why?

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Welp. Good enough for me. Anyway, Suzu starts worrying about the card and then Alisa touches it because she has a thing for tempting fate and then...

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YES~! YES~! YES~! Battle time~! Hooray~!

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...Just WHAT was on that card?!

So, Suzuka tries to talk to Alisa. And then Alisa turns into Tankyu and takes a nice long nap.

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And then we return to epic battle music as Nanoha gathers the troops to go save her friends who she just decided were in trouble. :T Just saying. Ah, well. I guess she was right in the end... But, still...

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Right. They're probably just dead. That's all~ :D

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Hayate says with a calm and goofy, unflinching smile and creepy, staring, giant, eyes that see EVERYTHING.

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OH HELLO SUDDEN, UNEXPECTED FANSERVICE! FUNNY SEEING YOU HERE! :3

...But her name is Arf. That's an even bigger turn-off than the dog ears. ;_;

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Also, looks like Zafira finally got back from buying the milk. The most sacred duty of any golem-werewolfman-thing.

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And when I find you, you WILL be mine. AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

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Next we cut to Nanoha at the forests where we last saw Alisa. I wonder what happens.

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Oh. That's... a shame. They were two of the most likable characters, so far. Though, I'd probably feel more sad if you weren't playing the music you've used whenever you were trying to make people sad. Because, honestly, it feels generic now. And it's actually kind of trained me to feel a little bit irritated when I hear it because of how frequently it's been used in the trial. It's the sad music equivalent of the circus music in JFA.

Anyway, Nanoha touches the card and then...

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Aw. Really? The card only works on disposable characters, huh? :T

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Ooooh~! Is that code for "RPG Battle Minigame"?!

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Aw~ It's cute~ It's a cute l'il digimon~!

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Does that actually mean something? Because if it did, that would be super cool.

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Step 1: Act like you just want to talk

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Step 2: When it's clear they aren't listening, make it clear that you intend to beat them up until they become good guys.

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Step 3: No matter their response, it is now time for you to beat the living stuffing out of them.

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Oh HELL YEAH~! Battle Minigame! YES~! YES~! YES~! PREPARE TO DIE LITTLE DIGIMON!!!

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DIVINE BUSTEEEEEEEEEEEER!!!

So, yeah. After a long and tiring battle (though very well put together and exciting/enjoyable. Really! Good job on the battle system, it's fantastic!) of me spamming Divine Buster and Regain Mana, I managed to kill the Darkling. But my friends are still dead, and I have no answers. Just what is going on?

Also, the card went into emergency shutdown mode. Whatever that means.

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...Oh, Nanoha.

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...Oh, Nanoha. They're...They're just sleeping. It's...It's okay.

And that's about where that scene ends.

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Next scene, we're in...whatever this place is. AND NO I'M NOT ALRIGHT, FATE! TWO OF THE GOOD CHARACTERS ARE DEAD! SCREW YOU! ;A;

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...Oh, Nanoha.

And then Vita just further cements herself as a jerk by telling me to magical girl up or whatever. Like, seriously. Two people are dead. Learn some tack, hammerhead. Also, Hayate is still smiling like a creep. :<

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And now the epic music returns! Time to bring Alisa and Suzu back to life! STRATEGY MEETING GOOOO!

Also, it turns out that they're in a hospital and Alisa and Suzu are actually in a coma. Oh, well. STRATEGY MEETING GO!!!

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Have they tried exploding something?

Okay, so they're planning to go and destroy all the cards (provided they exist) to stop everyone from ending up in a coma.

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Pfft~ Okay, that got a chuckle out of me.

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......Are you serious? Two people are already in an irreversible coma and YOU'RE LOOKING FOR A NAME FOR THE CAUSE?

For the record, they called it "Cards of Corruption". Hrm... I think it's a little generic. I'd have called them HOLY CRAP THESE PUT PEOPLE IN COMAS GUYS cards. Or just Coma Cards for short.

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Okay, I'll give this mopefest a pass. But just this one. And, again, I'd suggest changing the music. It just... Doesn't have as much emotional impact as it should do for this scene.

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Oh, wait. The next frame is Fate suddenly jumping in. Guess this wasn't going to be a sad scene after all.

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Oh. Spoke to soon. And it's a speech about friendship, too. My favorite.

And now Fate is telling us a story from all the way back 1 year in the past.

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And so, we wake up to Miss Fanservice in our largely wooden room.

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Huzzah for vague hints of something dangerous! Also, check out Arf's face. She's not worried at all!

Okay, so apparently I'm going to a small planet that knows nothing about magic. And, also, we have an investigation segment.

Basically, what's going on is that I'm heading to Earth because my mother wants Grief Seeds so that she can catch Lugia. And then she'll be happy and smile and that's good. And Arf's telling me that they're evil. And that's that scene.

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And now I'm on Earth. Honing in on the Grief Seed's magic signal and whatnot.

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Ohai, Nanoha. What's up? Didn't realise that the white ticks are devouring you as well...

Anyway, I try to perform an activation ritual and then Nanoha asks me to stop because activating Lost Lugia will hurt a bunch of people. But I still want to do it anyway, and then...

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WOOHOO~! BATTLE TIME! LET'S GO! DEATH TO ALL HUMANKIND! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA~!

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Okay, so apparently Bardiche shoots golden truths and Nanoha turned into a man. I am officially lost.

And Nanoha's barrier is the red truth. ....Okay.

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That's a big scythe. :manella:

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"Oh, sorry! I didn't mean to almost kill you WHILE SWINGING A BIG ASS SCYTHE AT YOUR HEAD!"

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Uh.... Do you REALLY have a choice? Like, come on. OH SORRY! STOP THE BATTLE! I DON'T WANT TO CONTINUE RIGHT NOW. SEE YOU TOMORROW! And then Fate is like "Okay, cool. See you tomorrow."

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Like...Defend me, I guess? I mean, you can choose not to. Whatever man, it's cool.

Okay, so after a cutscene where Fate!Beatrice uses the golden truth to counter NanoBattlers purples, our battle ends.

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Okay, sure. You win. Yay.

And now it's back to SUPER HAPPY KILL KILL BATTLE TIME!

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Well, if it's heading your way... WHY ARE YOU STANDING AROUND JUST WAITING FOR IT TO HIT YOU?!

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Wait. Are you just straight up trying to MURDER ME, NOW?!

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Anyway, Nanoha finishes beating the ever loving crap out of me (;_;) and demands to know why I want the Jewel Seeds. I refuse to tell her. She complains that I'm breaking my promise, and then asks that I tell her my name. I do.

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And then this happens. Like, maybe it's the exclamation mark or just how casual Nanoha says that but... I mean, I just tried to kill her. She beat me up. It just... No matter how nice a character is, this dialogue seems completely bizarre to me.

Anyway, I tell Nanoha to hit the road and she says her farewells.

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And now I'm home. Huh. This apartment looks familiar. I just can't put my finger on i-

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Nope! Nope! That game never happened! Be quiet, you! (Though, at least we now know who it was who trashed the place. GG, Fate.)

Anyway, Arf's cooked me dinner and I settle in to clean my wounds. Of course, Arf demands I tell her about the girl I was fighting and so I cave in. So, after I examine around the place (and was sorely disappointed to find I couldn't watch TV. :T) I tell her about what happened. Arf then tells me not to trust Nanoha and whatnot. And, honestly, I agree with her. You can't just trust every random person just because they say they want to help. Hell, especially not after they try and kill me! In the end, Fate agrees and we lead into a talk about Fate's mother.

Anyway, Fate says that she loves her mother and Arf says that Fate's mother is evil and hurts Fate on the inside and-

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excuse me? What the hell?! Is this canon? That's pretty screwed up. Wow.

Anyway, Fate has...some issues. She feels she deserves getting whipped and she then defends her mother some more. After that...pleasant conversation... we head to bed.

Next morning, Arf wakes me up and lets me know she's found the next Grief Seed. And so we head off to do that.

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HM. I WONDER, FATE! IT TOTALLY COULDN'T BE THAT BIG JEWEL THING FIVE CENTIMETRES AWAY FROM YOUR NOSE, COULD IT?

In any case, I click that and-

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Oh, you have got to be kidding me.

Anyway, I go to activate the SUPER WELL HIDDEN thingymajigger when all of a sudden-

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Gotdwammit, ???. What are you even doing here?!

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Anyway, ??? turned out to be Manoha. Who is stalking me for some reason. Seriously! She just appears. What, was she just sitting down waiting for me the whole time?

Anyway, Nanoha starts giving another speech about good or whatnot. (Guys, come on. Even for Mahou Shoujo this is way too many speeches on kindness and friendship!) And Fate calls out Nanoha on how she acts like she thinks she knows Fate. A very valid point. I don't care how much Nanoha watches us in secret, there's no way she could know someone after just one day.

So, I start using the golden truth, Nanoha dodges into the sky, I suddenly appear and then... THE MUSIC CHANGES AS I FIRE MORE TRUTHS! THERE ARE ONLY 18 MAGICAL GIRLS ON THE ISLAND OF ROKKENJIMA! NANOHA IS TOO SLOW! NANOHA IS INCOMPETENT! AHAHA.WAV

Nanoha is only slow compared to Blitz Rush. Nanoha is capable of defeating Fate. Nanoha proceeds to block with the Red Truth.

More truths collide and the-

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Um... Is it just me or did Nanoha's sprites suddenly get much better quality? Uh... Maybe she's just someone who looks better from the back. And has a different hair colour from the back. And darker clothes... You know what? Maybe this is just a stunt double. That would make sense!

Anyway, Nanoha suddenly gets serious and badass. But then I point a sword at her and threaten to kill her. No, seriously. Take a look.

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See?! So much for Fate being a nice, kind person. :sideglance2:

So, Raising Heart disables and I get the Grief Seeds.

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And then another frienship speech happens with the magical friendship music. Look, I get that Nanoha is about friendship. And I get that this is supposed to be emotional. You both have done a great job with the actual script writing. You know how to get people excited. Despite my poking fun at this, let's be serious for a second. This case, is anvilicious. I want to be blunt. There's only so many time you can give a speech about friendship or kindness with the exact same music playing, before it get's grating. Before it gets boring. I want to like this case more. Because it is well done. But the fact that it keeps doing the same thing over and over is hurting it. A lot. Sigh... Maybe it's just because I'm not a Nanoha fan. I don't know. In any case, that's what I think. I'll try not to bring this up again, because I think I've really exhausted this topic for all it's worth.

Anyway, we find out that Nanoha's been collecting Grief Seeds because the Yandere Ferret told her to and because she likes helping people and then we send her on her way.

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Anyway, we skip ahead 2 weeks and it turns out that Arf has damaged their ankle. Apparently, they were in a fight with a girl who could use rock slide (was her name Onix?) and Arf is now in pain. Anyway, we now have another jewel seed and it's time for us to go get another.

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So, I track down Nanoha (shouldn't be too hard considering she's been stalking me) and we begin our fight. It's a duel to the death! Do or die! Battle time super time giga-hyper-mega-fight-in-time!

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Our battle rages on and Nanoha brings us out to sea. Good. This ought to be <COOL, POP AND CUTE>. Anyway, our battle rages on (and we go through another speech, though it's not a friendship speech this time... More a backstory speech...) and finally Nanoha manages to straight-up kill us.

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Or, so it seems. Looks like I'm still alive after all. Huh.

So, apparently, I've been out for two days and there's news about my mother. That's cool. It seems that Nanoha went to fight her and...

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....come again, Arf? I couldn't hear you over THAT SMILE ON YOUR FACE! ;A; (Honestly, I don't care that much considering the whipping stuff but, eh. Apparently Fate does.)

So... It turns out Nanoha killed Fate's mother and also that collecting Grief Seeds is illegal and we're criminals now. Except, we get off with just community service. Because Fate was doing it to make her mother smile. Yep. I can see that one going over well in court. "Sure, I committed acts of terrorism and violence, but you gotta understand! I was tryin' to make my mother smile!" "OH! Okay, then! In that case, you get ten days community service instead of the usual death penalty." "YAY~!!!"

So, after Fate talks about how lonely is for a bit, we get a visit from OUR FAVOURITE PERSON EVER!

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HI, NANOHA! You mother murdering monster. And she's here to be MY FRIEND~! And to get me to join that organisation thing.

Anyway, ten hours of self pitying and friendship speeches later, I think I'm ready to make my decision.

(Sadly, I didn't manage to screenshot. Mainly because I couldn't tell where I was supposed to. All in all, I joined the organisation and me and Nanoha became friends. And then we hugged. Hooray.)

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We now return to your regularly scheduled programming.

Okay, so a small friendship speech happens and then I'm ready to go and fight or whatnot.

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Anyway, we head to Hayate The Combat Butler's mansion and we prepare for the final battle.

So, the cards turn out to be alien cards and now we're gonna go find them and fight whatever's behind them.

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And now I'm Fate with Raising Heart. Hey, while we're at it we may as well give her a soul jar and time stopping powers.

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Ohai, murder card. What are you doing here?

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AND NOW IT'S TIME TO FIGHT THE ALLEY! LVL100 LITTER ATTACK!!!

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Oh, wait. It's just Vatra.

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And now it's battle time. You know the drill~! SPAM ATTACKS GOOOO!!!

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50 Billion evades later, and I finally spammed Blast Calmity to victory. It would've probably taken less time IF FATE DIDN'T KEEP STUFFING UP HER DODGING!

Anyhoo, Vatra disappears and I head back to Hayate's home.

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Well, MAYBE if you ACTUALLY DODGED for once in your life! >:T

After that, Hayate and the rest decide that we just need to wait and see if any info comes up and we disperse.

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DID YOU JUST KILL SHIGERU MIYAMOTO!?

Anyway, Kwan- I mean, Vitamins gets sick of waiting and goes on a little rant.

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And then suddenly Hayate's wearing a magical girl uniform. Okai.

Anyway, one trust speech later...

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And we're done.


Final Verdict

Okay, let's start off with the good news, since you can probably already guess what the bad news is going to be.

The actual writing? Great. The music choices? 90% of the time, great. The battle system? Fantastic and flawless. It was a brilliant and ingenious system that was heaps of fun, and I wish it was used more often. The writing was good, too. When you wanted me to be excited, I was. And I could tell you have talent in writing cases. However, well...On to the bad news.

Friendship speeches. I'm not going to harp on this for too long, but come on. At some point in the case, it actually felt like the plot had just resulted into a loop of Battle then Friendship Speech over and over again. And, well, I believe that there's a certain kind of effect that has. At it's earliest saturation, it's mildly irritating. At it's second saturation, it's boring. At it's third saturation, the speeches stop meaning anything. At the fourth saturation... Well, they actually aggravate the reader. And, not only that, they make the game tiring. And that's a real shame too. Because, I wanted to like this trial so much. I can see a lot of effort is put into it. But around the halfway mark it started becoming a chore to play the game.

Secondly, I can't see this game appealing to non-Nanoha fans. But that's just personal opinion, and it may not even be a con to you.

Thirdly...The sprites. Honestly, I don't mind that some of the characters (Fate, in particular) had sprites that weren't exactly...fantastic. (Her chin is a triangle!) But, I couldn't help but be distracted by the WHITE FLEAS OF DEATH! That, and the wildly varying quality. (Compare Fate to Vita, or MANoha to backwards facing Nanoha.)

Fourthly, please add more variety to the music. The only music that stayed fresh throughout the game, was the battle music. And the "sad music" actually became quite grating.

In any case, I personally didn't like this game/case. However, I have a feeling that it would probably appeal to the Nanoha fans of AAO. On top of that, I feel that most of my complaints are actually things that could be fixed. So, my final verdict is that it was well made, but with large/glaring flaws. I don't think I'll be replaying it any time soon, but I reccomend all Nanoha fans to check it out.

And that's all for here. Thanks for joining me for this LP/Review, and a big thank you to NN and Kwando for making the game.
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Enthalpy
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by Enthalpy »

Interesting review. Some of the images in the middle didn't load for me, but I'm pretty hyped for the rest of your reviews. (Unfortunately, I'm much less hyped for BondS because the Nanoha is a major turn-off for me. I'll probably still play/read the end product, though.) Out of curiosity, who's next on the queue?
[D]isordered speech is not so much injury to the lips that give it forth, as to the disproportion and incoherence of things in themselves, so negligently expressed. ~ Ben Jonson
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DWaM
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by DWaM »

Well, since enigma drew first blood, I suppose I'll have to follow, too.
The following review contains spoilers for kwando and NN's entry. You have been warned.
Spoiler : Kwando/NN's entry :
(Anything look familiar, by the way?)

Mahou Shojou Lyrical Nanoha ~ BondS

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The hardest part to believe is that she's actually ten in all of this...
...Okey-dokey, before we begin, I would like to place a disclaimer: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT NANOHA ACTUALLY IS. Well, I... HAD no idea what Nanoha actually is... until ysterday. Specifically, yesterday, 5 PM CET. I'd seen signs of it on the forums, yes and I was aware that both kwando and NN were fans of the show, but I personally never actually watched the show. It didn't interest me or seemed like something I'd particularly enjoy. The reason I'm telling you this is, of course... Well... The entry is basically... A Nanoha fanfic. So I want you to understand this review is based from the point of view of someone who is completely unaware of what the show is - the setting, the characters, the plots, the past - none of that stuff. Completely... in the dark.

So you can probably imagine my surprise and sheer shock that I experienced when I saw the title of this entry. Firstly, I have to applaud the major risk - it became evident that you weren't shooting for a crossover like Curtain or anything of the sort (that said, I'm not sure how a crossover would've possibly even worked with AA, so perhaps it was foolish of me to expect it), but a full-on representation (that is what I am assuming, anyway) of Nanoha's "universe" in the AAO editor. Now... I'm going to have to be honest here - a part of me was sort of hoping it was a troll and that... the real feature presentation would begin any click now. N-Now, before you get any ideas - I'm not saying that it was SO BAD I JUST WANTED TO SHUT IF OFF, nononono - I was hoping for that because you'd taken, as I said, an extremely risky approach. The risk was so massive that this entire concept could've gone one of two ways: It would either fall dead on arrival or be amazing. There was no middle ground here, unfortunately. Why, you may ask? Well - remember how I happened to mention how I wasn't personally familiar with Nanonha? Remember also that part where I was the judge - a person that would need to play this entry no matter what the circumstances? Of course you don't, I thought so. (WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!!? I JUST WANTED LOVE ;_;) Well, here's the thing. This is clearly a fanfiction. Usually, when one happens to read fanfiction, one does so with prior knowledge and interest in the series it's based off. The reason fanfiction exists is because you like a story so much that you wish it to continue in some way, no? Hence, it is reasonable assume that it is content made for fans. ...Sadly, that was not an assumption kwando and NN could've made in this case. The person that was going to play it was going in completely blind (as far as they knew). And, as such, they needed to find a way to introduce the previously mentioned setting, characters and plots to someone like that. They had a massive challenge of getting the player to understand what's happened before in order to fully connect with what's happening in the actual plot. And not only that! They needed to find a way to instantly hook the player into this "new" universe within the first few minutes.

And it is with great regret that I must inform you that I do not believe you succeed in those things. In fact, I'd say that in your request to set up proper foundation, you've actually ended up creating one of the biggest problems with the story and the way it was written. I will try to avoid being harsh and not to bring up points already mentioned by enigma, but as some of you have figured out: I did not enjoy this. I would like to say I appreciate the effort and the clear passion for the story and these characters, but... I just couldn't get into it or manage to properly enjoy it.
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Hi, I'm gonna be a complete ass for the next give or take several paragraphs. This image is to represent my mental state as I'm being a complete ass.
Enigma previously mentioned his issue of the overly-used friendship speeches, which I whole-heartedly agree. I cannot think of a scene off the top of my head in which the characters weren't going "Nanoha, ur so awsum". But it's actually part of an underlying issue here - the way the exposition is presented to the player. It's not that there wasn't any - GOD NO - it was that so much of this WAS ultimately just exposition. So many times I felt that characters were just sneaking in a "what happened that one time" in their dialogue to the point where I became wondering how much of the things said were coming from the characters and how much from the writer(s). This sounds incredibly harsh, but I want you to understand what my biggest turn-off here was - so many times, I felt like the characters "said" their emotions rather than "expressed" them. I'm not saying that there weren't any moments like that (the Fate in the hospital scene I felt was a step in the right direction), but many of them were. For example, Fate keeps saying so many times that she wants her mother to smile again. This is perfectly fine and a valid character motivation, but it's delivered in such a weak manner - a way that it almost feels like such an important part of a character's emotions is brought up in a daily conversation. The fact that it was said so many times... didn't help, sadly. What you could've done is have Fate resist to answer Afi's (I think her name was?) questions as to why she'd doing this and saving the actual reason for an emotional climax in which Fate ends up pouring her heart and soul out (this would've made the tragic death of her mother so much more emotional in my opinion, as well).
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This issue of "should've shown instead of told" could be applied to the Fate/Nanoha battles, as well. I understand you've working with the AAO editor and are forced under major restrictions graphical-wise, but I'm afraid that... they just got kind of boring for me. They went out for such long amounts of time and in all of them it was more or less the background and Nanoha, with occasional Umineko backgrounds. It just ended up feeling so... lifeless, especially when the majority of the dialogue during them is characters saying what attacks they're using and what they're doing. What you could've done is perhaps implemented the (very well done!) previously seen battle system, gradually increasing the difficulty of Nanoha's boss until the third showdown (or, in this case, medium-easy-hard, I guess?). And in the third showdown, you could've made it so that the outcome is the same, no matter what the player actually does (make it basically a no-lose situation), throwing bits dialogue between the two after each turn. It would've made the pace feel just right and really invest the player in what he's doing as Fate.

And that, put together, adds up to one simple truth - I didn't really CARE for anything that was going on. So many characters were introduced in the beginning that it's hard to get attached to any of them (and again - we're TOLD that they're super friends). Naturally, this is something that would've been fixed through flashbacks, but... It ended up being a major turn-off from the case for me. Perhaps this is subjective of me, perhaps it's simply my own twisted sense of looking at things, perhaps I'm just... really not meant to like Nanoha ever, but... This ended up being the biggest issue for me. And the worst part is, after all that exposition, after all that time spent on Fate's story... I didn't really see how it had anything to do with what was going on in the central plot...

All that being said, there are positives! I mean, come on, nobody wants a COMPLETELY downer review, right? For one, the battle system I felt was really well done. It was fun, it gave me stuff to do and I would've liked seeing a lot more of it in the actual game. And while I have my issues with the way the actual STORY was handled, what bits of dialogue that were just there as characters being themselves did show promise - it's just, alas, I personally could not find myself invested in the story all that much due to... well, that one big issue up there. R-Remember? That part where... I was being an ass...? And hey, that's just my personal opinion! As I said - perhaps I'm being too nitpicky or maybe I have a thing for hating on magical girls, I don't know.

I happened to ask this question earlier on the xat (it was more or less something I happened to blurt out in the midst of my general surprise) - How do I judge this? Theme-wise, you did accomplish what I'd asked of you - even if I would've perhaps wished it would've been a part of the central story (but perhaps the "central story" merely serves as a backdrop to these "stories of how I met Nanoha"?). Story-wise, I personally disliked it, and the execution could've been a lot better (visually, as well - Enigma already mentioned the... poor sprites, but I was actually fine with most of them... except that one pose of Nanoha, where she has her mouth open wide - seemed as she was happy than she was sad or upset, as she was supposed to be). But, on the other hand... This isn't even made for me, I think. Putting aside the possibility that I'm just a huge ass (which I am, mind you, but), maybe the people that like Nanoha will enjoy the way the story has been adapted? From my point of view... I honestly can't possibly comment, I'm afraid. I just... I DON'T KNOW what to make of this. I try to be as objective as I possibly can, but... I'm afraid I simply didn't enjoy this, but... How can someone that's never seen the show enjoy what's clearly a love letter to it?!

...*Sigh* Man...
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I wish kwando and NN the best of luck in their future projects. This one... I suppose just didn't end up appealing to me. I appreciate the clear time and effort put into it. I can see the love for the franchise and the characters, I just you didn't have quite the right idea on how to present it. Perhaps this shouldn't have been used for the comp, but rather a straight-up fanfiction (on AAO, I mean?). Made for the fans, by the fans kind of thing. No need for plot-dumping, exposition, just... Ready-set-go?

I... Honestly don't know. I genuinely don't know how to conclude this...
I...

...
I'm sorry...? :(
It was during this review that I came across an official decision for this comp - because of the different nature of the entries we've gotten and the fact that there are no factors to compare the entries to objectively. In other words, chances are the verdict will come down to what we liked the most. And as such, I personally find it unfair to rank these games/trials in any order since... there is no real criteria for it here. Hence, as such, in this comp - there will be no actual rankings. Only the winner will be announced, aside form these reviews/LPs.
Gumpei
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Re: Time Goes By...

Post by Gumpei »

something about this is familiar
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